My 15th shot

I felt numb. I didn’t want to feel anything. I had to take care of my son in the hospital. I didn’t have time and energy to deal with the interferon. All my time and my existence should be for him. There’s a hesitation to shot. Once I thought maybe I can skip it this time….only once…for my beloved son. However, I didn’t want to give up, not now. I said to the syringe: bring that bloody hell interferon on! I’m already in hell, I’m afraid of nothing now.

After the shot, I felt ok. That’s thrilled me! It was my 2nd night to sleep in the hospital, but I handled it pretty good (I thought). I slept only 2-3 hours and I was ready whenever he needed me…I’m a superwoman again (I thought).

The day after, I felt nauseous and lifeless again…DAMN YOU INTERFERON!! I acted slow and a bit disoriented cos the headache bother me. I took panadol, the red one, twice(panadol becomes my 2nd hubby now ^-^). I fought the effects of the treatments. It was the hardest fight, for my boy.

Whenever my friends or my families came to visit, they noticed that I looked so tired, pale and (sometimes)not focus. Some of them only knew that I just felt tired staying in the hospital…few who knows my illness, asked more and tried to support me more. I...just want to go home and rest my body on my bed, but I had to stay, to take care of him, to support him..til he’s ok. What "splendid" days!