(Good) Cry helps!

3 months left. Such a long way to go. My mood goes up and down but 3 weeks back were mostly ok. It was accelarated by long holiday and Eid Mubarak. Met lots of people n relatives.
This week?...uh uh, rolling down again. I was too excited, too confident bout my great feeling then I went around, housekeeping, cooking, socializing etc more. The result? I spent 3 days resting at home, skipped working, feeling guilty n miserable. The worse, I had fever, bad headache, stomach ache and can't sleep for days. All in all I feel so so wrong.
One time, I went back to my remedy. No body's home. I just sit in the living room after "long journey" from work (I felt it was my very challenging way home ever) then started to cry. Not lasted long but a good one. Seem it's been ages I dropped my last tears. I dig up my angry n sadness then I threw them out by tears n a bit (scary) scream. Aaagh, then exhaling to catch my breath. Amazingly, I felt better then. It really helped.
At first, it was very tempting to ask my doctor one more time for anti depressant. Such a panacea for me. He would be reluctant to give me one and I understand his considerations about taking it. I'll think bout it again but now I don't need it. The last cry do help me. So people, for sometimes, good cry really works to help releasing bad feeling but don't do it too often. I know, you guys don't like sissy.